It's okay to not be okay

Reblog this on tumblr!

 commissions   are open!

Follow me on Tumblr

Follow me on Instagram


I'm updating the description on this because I'm disappointed

 at how many people miss the point of this piece even though it's so simple.

It's okay to not be okay.

Maybe you've been abused and you feel angry and hurt, people tell you to be the "bigger person" and "get over it".

 No, you have the right to feel what you do, it's okay to feel that way.

Maybe you've fallen ill with something terminal, your whole life changes, 

and it's a painful change and you are feeling sad or angry because of the ways people now treat you,

 and all the hurdles you have to jump though now? 

Your situation is real, just like your feelings about it.

Maybe you are gay or bi, some loved ones have turned out to be huge bigots, have hurt you,

 and you are feeling betrayed or even devastated at how easy it was for them to turn their back on you.

 You have a right to feel that way, what they did was not okay.

Maybe you experienced sexual violence, or other violent traumas, and you are feeling a loss of control in your life,

 you are having to deal with feelings of rage and sadness, fear and self blame, and anger.

 At the person or people who did this to you, the people who have blamed you,

 for the fact you will have to deal with this for the rest of your life and the person who did it most likely (but hopefully not)

 has not received any justice and received defense and approval instead?

 yeah, you have a huge reason to feel everything you do, none of this should of happened to you,

 and those who hurt you should be held responsible, not defended while you are blamed and shamed for their crime.

Everyone goes through so many of these things,

 and it may feel like you are alone, 

but it's hard to realize others are around you who feel the same way,

 when we aren't allowed to express our feelings.

A lot of times in this society, people around us try to push us to suppress how we feel.

 Sometimes because they're the ones who made us feel like that, sometimes because they don't understand,

 or other times because they are ignorant about our situation,

 maybe we even have a couple fair weather friends in our circle.

 Being able to react to our situations is healthy,

 Accepting how we feel is healthy,

 and when we are stopped from taking that first step,

 it is more difficult to heal or accept the things that have happened to us.

 Not only that, but it is a toxic idea that it is somehow abnormal to not be okay when we have every reason not to be,

 and to let ourselves process the emotions that come with it, for what ever reason we are feeling them.

 if we can never let ourselves feel what we feel, then we won't ever acknowledge something is wrong,

 we will never inspect what is wrong, and we can't begin to fix what is wrong,

 and nothing positive or healthy can come out of suppression and denial of ourselves.

Never let anyone make you feel bad for having healthy human emotions,

 you are entitled to them as a human being who has the right to take up space and time in this universe.

The most important thing to remember is that what ever you are feeling, you are feeling it for a reason, and that is normal and okay.

An extra Note:

 I learned these things during my years of connecting with feminists,

 women of color, the lgbtqia community, and the disABLEd community.

 While this piece and quote pertains to and relies on all these different communities,

 most people have assumed this piece is only about anxiety or mental illness,

 because of my note on how this quote pertains to me.

And while a huge part of this is talking about mental illness, a lot of it isn't,

 because you could apply this to anyone going though something hard. 

Yet I've had people ignore this because they assumed it was only about mental illness.

You would think that is okay since groups and blogs are themed and what not, but it isn't for one reason:

 This is about our health, and about our identity and our struggles.

 But if it wasn't, and was only about mental illness,

 it would still be a vital idea to the communities and movements because: 

People from these walks of life will face assault and abuse, poverty, discrimination,

 not because of who we are, but because there are people out there who think they can treat us like we are not human,

 based on the color of our skin, gender, or sexuality, size, etc.

When you have a life that's full of hardships like that, it takes a toll.

 Many of us do develop some kind of mental illness or disorder from what we experience from all that trauma.

 Rates for depression among gay individuals is high compared to their hetero counterparts,

 and that is because of what gay individuals face.

It's the same for other marginalized groups.

People of Color develop PTSD from being targeted by racism.

We know the negative affects oppression and abuse has on our health.

 Even though there are countless studies on it, we don't need to be told something we already knew.

 Depression, anxiety, self harm, eating disorders,

 all those things are mental illness,

 and sometimes they come from no where,

 other times, they are a direct affect from our trauma.

Mental illness has everything to do do with our communities and movements.

I ask this of anyone viewing my art and reading this,

 do not ignore this quote just because it also pertains to mental illness.

 

 You want our support, you want us to bring to the table our voices, our experience, our knowledge.

 So do not ignore our voices when we speak of the psychological harm that the very forces we fight against have caused us.

 Do not turn your backs on us as if mental illness does not pertain to our place in society.

Do not pretend we don't exist and that our valuable experiences have nothing to offer our communities and movements.

 We can't separate the part of us that is a marginalized person from the part of us that is person with mental illness.

 It doesn't work that way, It has never worked that way,

 and we'd appreciate it if people would stop pretending it does.

While I know there are people who don't do that on purpose, people really need to start examining it anyway,

 and making an active effort to better the way they look at those around them in this sense.

No harm can come from it, only growth, acceptance, and strength.

<da:thumb id="345518352"><da:thumb id="345518352">



One of the many cards I made to sell at One Colorado.
I'm also currently working on a commission of this, making a poster size!
My cards are up for sale and to order a custom size they're up for commission as well. ^_^

I'll be making prints available too soon, probably through an etsy.




The inspiration behind this is pretty simple, but something that was overlooked.

For me, anxiety is a big part of my life as I've experienced it periodically all throughout my life. I've also had a chronic blood disorder that made a huge part of my childhood really shitty, have had a few traumas, you know, life.

All throughout, I've encountered people who passively and aggressively have treated me as lesser than, for being different. Treated me as if I was broken, you get what I'm saying?

I can't say which experience has been worse, I don't think that's something I should put on a scale. I don't believe in weighing traumas.

Though something was always the same, people scared of, ignorant to, indifferent to, or scoffing at me for going through natural life experiences.

Being ill is normal, many people experience it, so is having anxiety, being depressed, experiencing abuse, so on. It definitely doesn't feel okay at all because who enjoys feeling that way? No one. No one wants to be in pain. But it is okay, you aren't a bad person or strange or abnormal for going through natural things.

Only toxic people will treat you like you're abnormal, and there are many people out there like that.

I think it's because while they realize our pain is our biggest weakness, it is also our strongest strength, and if we realize how strong we are by acknowledging we continue to live and take care of ourselves in our own way, they won't be able to demonize us anymore, and they lose their method of making themselves feel better about themselves, by tearing others down.

They say you have to be normal,  but really, is normal even a thing in a world where literally no one is the same? Aren't we a society that strives for individuality, except hypocritically when it comes to sexuality, gender, and life circumstances? And why is it that people scream the loudest about lives they know nothing about? Who is even saying these shitty things about people and emotions they don't have any understanding of?

It's okay to not be okay, it really is. If you have anxiety like I do, telling yourself that you're just a little stressed will hurt you more. Addressing you have anxiety and finding steps to help you from there is the best thing to do. 

The biggest part about admitting you're not okay is realizing it's okay to feel your emotions and your bodies reaction to whats going on. Your body feels those things for a reason, you feel certain emotions for a reason.

I don't want to ramble so I'll end it with this. 

It's okay to not be okay. it's okay to say it and to tell people. If someone wants you to pretend you are while you aren't, they aren;t thinking of your best interest, but of theirs. It's okay to take care of yourself and take things a day at a time. You are not a machine that can work a million miles a second, and you are worth taking care of. Rest, and discover what it means to take care of yourself and heal.